It’s the time of year when people begin gathering thoughts around their lived 2017 experience, and begin focusing on their desired 2018 experience. People assess their growth and accomplishments, as well as major lessons, losses, and disappointments. Reflection is such a useful tool to get us to the next phase in life, however it must be used with care. Reflections can spark inspiration and a sense of pride, as well as blame, regret, anger and a sense of failure. When we don’t know how to properly both praise and critique ourselves, we let our critical voices take charge. Taking our criticism with us into the next year or phase in our lives, literally keeps us involved in the same cycle of self-inflicted abuse that our inner voice subjects us to.

The inner voice we have, may have a couple of sources. Some believe it to be our ego, which I agree with. Its not bad or good, however it’s the aspect of our mind that is most reactive and most expressive. It is governed by pride and fear, and the laws in which it abides, come from narratives that we have collected throughout life. The corrosive, destructible and often critical internal narrative, is a concept I’ve been fascinated with, ever since my life coach brought my own to my attention this year.

It was in July, and at the time, we were discussing if I should proceed in my decision to go on an epic 2-week trip to Peru, and trek the Inca Trail to Machu Pichu in September. I had been experiencing so much indecisiveness because I recently left my job, was living off of savings, and was so worried about the financial commitment to go. This had been a trip I declared a year prior and had already made plans to do, I just didn’t complete the financial commitment. I told her it would be irresponsible of me because what if I didn’t get back on my feet with the plans that I had in my head. In getting to the space of making my decision, my life coach asked me 6 simple words, who’s narrative are you listening to?

​Check out the remainder on Medium.

​BE You,
​Tiffany W.
​

How powerful are these words?
Has this happened for you?
Have you had shifts when you truly learned to embrace yourself?
Is this something you're still working on?

This is the exact space that I am in right now. I've been on this intentional self love journey for nearly 3 years and I can say that I truly feel powerful. I feel powerful finally being in a space where I authentically see and acknowledge the beauty within and around me. My relationship with God is deepest its ever been and I've connected to the divine spirit within me. I am so sure as to who I am, who I am not, what I want, what I need, what my purpose is, and most importantly, I am comfortable showing up as my authentic self without worrying how it will be perceived.

It took time and a lot of work to get here, but I believe it's worth the work. There is an Alicia Keys song that I believe completely embodies this powerful quotation.

"Brand New Me"

"It's been a while
I'm not who I was before
You look surprised
Your words don't burn me anymore
Been meanin' to tell ya
But I guess it's clear to see
Don't be mad
It's just a brand new kinda me
Can't be bad
I found a brand new kinda free

Careful with your ego
He's the one that we should blame
Had to grab my heart back
God knows something had to change
I thought that you'd be happy
I found the one thing I need
Why you mad?
It's just a brand new kinda me

It took a long, long time to get here
It took a brave, brave girl to try
It took one too many excuses, one too many lies
Don't be surprised, don't be surprised

 If I talk a little louder
If I walk a little taller
If I speak up when you're wrong
If I walk a little taller
I've been under you too long
If you notice that I'm different
Don't take it personally
Don't be mad
It's just a brand new kinda me

Ooh, it took a long, long road to get here
It took a brave, brave girl to try
I've taken one too many excuses, one too many lies
Don't be surprised, oh, said, you look surprised

Hey, if you were a friend
You'd wanna get to know me again
If you were worth the while
You'd be happy to see me smile
I'm not expecting sorry
I'm too busy finding myself
I got this
I found me, I found me, yeah

I don't need your opinion
I'm not waiting for your "OK"
I'll never be perfect,
But at least now I'm brave
I know my heart is open
I can finally breathe
Don't be mad
It's just a brand new kinda free
That ain't bad
I found a brand new kinda me
Don't be mad"


The miracle is in your power. The miracle is in your confidence. The miracle is in your love.
Get back to yourself, and let the miracles flow

BE You~
By: Tiffany W.

Wounded woman.
Don't be so hard on yourself.
You say you feel broken,
But you did not break yourself.
It was your mother, your father, your family, the system, the lovers, the friends, the acquaintances.
The lies, abuse, neglect,  and sickness.
You took the brokenness and pursued what you thought was life but only seemed to be mirrors of your wounds.
Don't worry you can be healed if you want.
You can choose to be more, live more, and love more.
Brokenness is a state of mind. Its a state of helplessness that you do not have subscribe to.
I know sometimes you wonder, what's wrong with me?
Am I good enough?
Am I beautiful enough?
Am I smart enough?
I know sometimes you feel hopeless.
You see others smile and hope that your smile can be as genuine as theirs one day;
You see others in love, and you hope you can have a love as beautiful as that one day.
You see other women radiate, and hope that you could have that much confidence one day.
Sometimes you wish the cause of your pain didn't happen, but that is not self love.
That is not acceptance.
You must choose to evolve.
Own your hurt.
Honor your wounds.
Work towards healing and welcome with an open spirit, change, growth and transformation.
See seasons rotate, and caterpillars turn into butterflies, snakes shed their skins,  and the leaves turn colors.
Look at your teachers...the creatures and life around you.
Look at the ocean, the moon and the sun. They love like you. They live like you. They are essential to the circle of life. They are one with you.
The moon spends most of its monthly parts in pieces but what everyone remembers is her fullness.
Her wholeness shines bright and illuminates the last. Ever so often, her wholeness emits colors that the world is fascinated at and gathers to see.
You will change and one day youll feel whole and then go thru a process of evolution once again.
Despite your wounds, choose to love yourself through and through; as you do so, you teach those around you how to love you too.
You will see that the greatest love, is the love you have for yourself.
 
By: Tiffany W.