The holidays bring up so many great topics to discuss. Folktales, health, religion, family, materialism, capitalism, and gratitude. On the day of Black Friday, I am inspired to write about our attachment to things and expectations. A life chasing things and expectations does not leave one fulfilled. So while you're shopping in store and online, just keep some things in mind. Do not get attach to things, for they are only the outcome of a desired experience. Staying focused on things only provides temporary satisfaction, but offers little if any fulfillment. Beyond the holidays, take this notion to your life, as I will my own. Things come and go. As we've seen through the natural disasters that have happened way too frequently in the 10-15 years, people lose their homes and belongings all the time. People have things, and want more things. Things could be material possessions, or even titles. Some people want a degree, a promotion, a relationship, a family. There's nothing wrong with these desires but what is your attachment to them. What is the "why" behind them? What do they represent? What is the desired experience and journey. around obtaining these things? Looking beyond the thing itself, offers one to live through intention as oppose to expectation. With expectation, there's a focused goal, or outcome; when even accomplished or received does not offer contentment in an individual. No appreciation. Think of times when you wanted something, and then you thought, ok whats next? no time to reflect on the joy of attaining that thing; no gratitude expressed for the journey to get there. You got it, and wanted something next. Moving from expectation, to intention, allows one to be open to all experiences along the way. For example, many women want to get married and have children, but how many think about the experience? Not just having a family because that's what they saw in movies or were told to do, or even because they're lonely. how many set an intention of creating beings that will massively contribute to the greatness of society? or be the counterpart to a partner that will change was companionship looks like? Or for a degree, I can think of so many individuals who just got one to get one; or for better pay and not only hate their career field but didn't really care for the experience while attaining it.
When we see our lives through our hearts, from an intention setting place, we are more aligned with our God like selves. God already has abundance at our finger tips, but the ultimate goal in life is to love, teach, preach and heal. As a result, those "things" will come.
Its the fact of staying in gratitude, and happiness will come. When you are grateful for all you have, and each experience in your life, your spirit is at ease, and you as an individual are happy. When you are happy, you are positive, and greater things tend to happen for you. Now just because you live in gratitude does not mean you will have all those riches in the world, for there are individuals in societies that do not focus on materialism and wealth as our western society does, but the point is that when you stay in intention, in gratitude, and are not focused on the "thing", the expectation, your life feels and looks completely different.
Go through the goals you have, write them down. look at them, and beside each, write how you want to fee, or what you want to experience in their attainment. Also think about why they would be important to you? Whether its a partner, a flat screen tv, new car, or new promotion, when we are driven by "why"s as opposed to "whats" we experience life on another level. We are able to sit in gratitude, and be happier people, which in the end, increases our quality of life!
Written by: Tiffany Wright
Today is the day in which millions of Americans will gather to reflect on what they're thankful for. Some with friends, familiy, shelter mates, or nature. Some who would typically celebrate may be working or serving our country in other capacities. In whatever capacity, gratitude is being lifted to the heavens at an all time high today. In the evening or maybe next morning, more Americans will set out to spend millions of dollars on goods that will hopefully contribute to a future state of gratitude for someone else. Whatever you do, stay in Thanks throughout the day, and thereafter. Those who are known to be the most happiest are also the most grateful. Just because you have a lot or are successful, it does not equate to happiness. It is the gratitude expressed in reflection of one's life that secures their happiness. This is why on Thanksgiving you can think of your whole year, pick out some major challenges, and truly smile about how you got through. To feel that power everyday, is a gift that everyone should have. There is something to always be thankful for; In all things, give thanks. Not only is it a way to acknowledge your blessings, but understand that someone is always praying for that which you don't express thanks for. If your car breaks down, be thankful you have a car to get fixed. If you run out of food, be thankful that you have shelter or a refrigerator to put food into. If at Thanksgiving you get to see a family member you don't care for, be thankful you have family, and a place to go for dinner. Share with at least 3 people why you are grateful for them. Be in the spirit, and continue to shine your light because I am thankful you are here. The world would not be the same place if you were not in it!
Happy Day of Gratitude!
When you're growing up, you imagine the life you want. You imagine the experiences you want to have. What you don't imagine is that road traveled until those figments of your imagination come into fruition. When we look ahead, we think of the glory but never consider the struggles or challenges that may come our ways. In a previous post, I mentioned a book I'm reading entitled, The Road Less Traveled. This book speaks upon the psychological outcomes of the human experience when dealing with struggle or challenges. People either embrace tough times, or pretend as if they don't exist. The book suggest that if people trained themselves to deal with struggle, discomfort and pain, then life would seem more bearable during actually tough times, and one could maturely accept life, and just as well continue to function, thrive and grow.
In my recent experience, I realized that there is another aspect of life...experiences that I call the "Floating Season." This is a season in which unpredictability seems to surround you. You're not really sure of the next step, and because of this uncertainty, it is when you seem the most out of control of your circumstance, yet you have the most control of the next steps. When those who plan, actually have a free canvas to create the lives they want, it can become overwhelming. At age 26, I wanted to start BE! I prayed for whatever circumstance to occur to allow that to happen, and let me tell you...I'm in a Floating Season. I was fired from my Masters degree job earlier this year; I was expected to receive unemployment from February 2013 until February 2014 but received it 1/4th of that time. Because of the times, I gratefully got to fall back on my savings which I ended up going through. For the first time in a long time, I turned to some financial assistance from my family. In the midst of it, there were times when I wondered when I would eat, or where gas money would come from. I began a health & wellness coaching business and realized, entrepreneurship wasn't as romantic as it seem. Everything in my life seemed to be afloat. So much so, that even though I had all the freedom in the world, sometimes I just wanted to ball up in a corner. Yet through it all, Gratitude was the surest way to pull me out of a state of unknown, to power.
The intriguing note is that I'm not the only one to experience major transitions like this. I know so many people in their Floating Season, and its challenging for them. We are in a time where college grads are experiencing low unemployment rates, and high debts; 20 somethings are living with family because of their expenses outweighing their capability to function independently. More than ever couples are together, pregnant, and then separated, leaving young moms to be sole providers. With pop culture giving power to the molly, body enhancements, and a YOLO lifestyle, those looking for love, or even monogamous love, live as a minority; so you have 20 somethings who focus on their careers, become successful and get to a point where they feel like they want to share their life and are alone! The "follow your passion" philosphy leaves a lot of excited dreamers financially strapped because they didn't hear about the hard work that goes with their dream. SO many things, that present a shift in identity; us looking at ourselves as our present, future, and past selves thinking what happens next. Whatever happens, and whatever exists at the moment be present in Gratitude. Greatness attracts greatness. Light attracts light. Gratitude attracts abundance, and even though life will happen to us all, be your best, and think the about best possible outcome of every situation. You will never be able to control the future but who you are, and the thoughts you concentrate the most on, will manifest in your life.
Every morning I make sure the first thing I do is state 10 things I'm grateful for. This simple assignment drives me everyday to understand that my Floating Season is the God given opportunity for me to define myself through the visions he put in my heart. For you, your Floating Season may reflect a time where you too get to face your true self ; your passions; your dreams; your areas of growth.
No matter what, when in doubt, be grateful! You shall prosper, and as each season comes, it will also pass.
Written by: Tiffany Wright
One thing that is for certain is that stress will occur in life. There are major stressors, like life events, and small stressors that we don't realize such as traffic. The body is built to react and protect itself from stress, but as conscious beings, we can take our own steps in managing our stress. Stress for some reason is at an all time high during the holiday season. When we should ideally be reflecting on what we're grateful for, between planning parties, attending parties, thinking of gifts, and even the consequences of all the holiday food indulging, at times we can feel overwhelmed. No matter what, always SMILE! BElieve that life is beautiful, and it will appear as so. Here are some other tips to keep you sane.
1. Breathe Deep, Slow Breaths.
Research shows that the body and brain respond well to just a few, 5-sec breaths. This allows your stress level to decrease, increase oxygen flow and open your heart to the universe to receive the greatness around you.
2. Think of 10 things that you're grateful for
Gratitude is the surest way to bring us back to reality. Many times we create extra mental stress on ourselves, thinking of the "what ifs", "what we need", and life is always easiest when just decide to be present and love on what we do have in life at the moment
3. Shift your mental focus.
Nothing can ever get to us, if we don't let it. Energy transfer.
3. Always remember, This too shall pass.
All matters of stress are temporary. Whether 1 min, 3 days, or 4 years, the factors in life that "stress" us out, always seem to change
4. Keep in Mind the Joy of the Seasons!
The seasons of life, and the Holiday season are all about the Joy and the possibilities new beginnings and blessings everyday, and every moment! Embrace the Joys!
Season's Greetings! Season's Tidings! and Never Sweat the SMall Stuff!
In the US, this week marks the coming of supermarket deals and master savings on electronics, jewelry and toys!! It could only be the week of what we call Thanksgiving! A day that represents a lot of different things to different people, but one common piece of knowledge is that food is involved! Now these means, plates upon plates, and even deserts the day of ...and maybe leftovers 2-3 days afterwards! When I was younger, I loved shredding turkey, adding bar-b-q sauce, and making a sandwhich for school! But times have changed, and because I don't believe in over indulging, today I will set you up for success! When I started my healthy journey, one major tool I learned to uphold in my life, is the art of meal prepping! What is meal prep you ask? Well, I choose a slot of time (no more than 40 minutes) on a Saturday or Sunday to cook my meals and prepare snacks for the whole week. Not only is it efficient, but you also save money doing this. You don't have to run out and buy food every time you're hungry because you have food to grab and go, whether at home or out and about. Secondly, it ensures that you are staying focused on eating clean. Thirdly, it teaches you about discipline, which will spill over into other areas of your life. I usually pick a protein, 2 veggies, and a whole grain. This week was chicken breast, kale, broccoli, cous cous, and brown rice. After cooking all the items at once, I scoop a little of the sides, and place them in a container, along with my chicken and there you have it! Now, in a week like Thanksgiving, meal prepping is important because it keeps me on track. Now of course I am going to eat the day of Thanksgiving, but that's it for me! No leftovers because I already have my meal prep! Researchers say that Americans gain an average of 10lbs between thanksgiving and Christmas! Is it worth it? Food is amazing, but should never overpower your will. There's nothing wrong with getting A LITTLE of everything, just be mindful of what actions much counteract your indulgences. Are you going to do some High Intensity Impact training that morning so that your metabolism is up and going? Are you going to be drinking lots of water that day to purify yourself, and make sure you don't get your thirst confused for hunger? Will you lead a family exercise after dinner so everyone could burn off some calories? Are you going to make sure that no matter what you still get a lot of dark green veggies during dinner? These are some of the precautions you can take! Food and family is powerful, but glutton does no one victory! Exhibit self control, and I know you will be proud! It will be worth it, and maybe you will be a healthy influence on your family and friends!
What are you going to make for meal prep this week?
On our journey of life, we learn that there are infinite roads to travel. Every choice we make absolute impacts are lives. Even the choice to not make a choice strongly impacts our lives. The moment you step out the house; the time at which you call someone back; whether or not you decide to give a friend or stranger a gift. For every action there's a reaction. In the stream of this ocean of decision, are the decisions that we do not make. Whether out of doubt, fear, discomfort, lack of confidence. These are the decisions that lead to the unfortunate world of shoulda, coulda, wouldas, or furthermore regrets. What would've happened if I did this differently? or went after that dream? or tried a little harder? or had that conversation. Its a powerful state to be aware of the desires we have in our hearts and to act on them, so that we do not live life full of regrets. Now of course, hindsight is 20/20 and we can always look back and think what if because at every moment the assignment is really to do your best. Do your best and live your best life in whatever way that means to you. Often times "Life" gets in the way; you know bills, family support, pride of maintaining (not) relationships, and just doing what has to be done. When we think of this, then it even becomes, how do you find the balance? I realize that what feels like harmony in my life, is different from your life and that is ok. This idea of "Balance" will never in fully exists, but one can be as conscious as always to prioritize what is important and maintain other compartments in your life that don't far too off of the shelf. Balance to me, is the handeling of life in a way in which I am growing yet at peace. I am pushing myself, and allowing my dreams to come true but also understanding the foundation of those dreams to be my spirituality and purpose; while understanding the why for dreams is to empower people and set up a more than comfortable current lifestyle for my family and build inter generational wealth.
I pledge to not live with any regrets. This idea of regrets is why I founded the BE Experience. An idea, a vision, a passion that I have been sitting on since January 10, 2010 in New York City, while I was in grad school. It was finally the time to begin, so I wouldn't keep saying to my family and friends " I'm going to do so and so; I'm working on so and so." I rather attempt a couple of times and feel I made my peace with a vision or dream, then to not. In my opinion, regrets happen when life is lived with extremes, and we ignore what seems to not fit for whatever reason. How do you live an unregrettable life? First start with your dreams and passions. Take 3 minutes in silence and write down all that you would do if money, time, age, family or any other boundaries you've given yourself, didn't exist. Secondly, what type of person do you want to be (or know you are and have been hiding). Take 1 minute and list those characteristics. Thirdly, take 2 mins, and think of the freedoms you desire: time, travel, adventures, etc. that you would act upon IF the limitations in your mind didn't exist. Step 4...start going after, and bringing into manifestation each and every one of those things. Why? If its in your heart, there is NO reason, that you should take it to the grave. Do you really want to know how to love an unregrettable life?
Today I read an amazing article entitled: Nurse Discusses 5 Regrets People Tell Her Before They Die
The Regrets are as follows:
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me. This was the most common regret of all.
2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
For the full article checkout the link : http://universityprimetime.com/school/unh/article/nurse-discusses-5-regrets-people-tell-her-before-they-die
I am currently reading a book entitled The Road Less Traveled,A New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values, and Spiritual Growth by Dr. M Scott Peck and for me thus far,it is one of those special awareness expanding pieces of personal development. The book is written by a psychiatrist and he goes into how people learned to manage difficult times. The book discusses the challenges that most humans have when dealing with difficult times in life, and understanding that there are psychological mechanisms that can be in place to help us through these times. Life is perfectly imperfect; and knowing that is important. Times will not always be "easy" because there are circumstances out of our control, and others which were an unfavored outcome of our behavior. Maybe an economic crisis, the treatment from a "loved" one, weather disasters, a layoff, or a break up. A very relevant struggle for many Gen-Yers has to do with unemployment, college debt, homelessness, and couch surfing. Life happens to us all, but how we deal with it effects how our lives tend to pan out. So rather than ignore what's going or completely become depressed, The Road Less Traveled explores mechanisms such as Delayed Gratification to be used as a selective rule for "struggle." Now you may think, tool of struggle? Why would I want to struggle. Well the author so far suggests that us learning how to delay gratification directly relates to understanding that there is pain in discipline, which is uncomfortable, unwanted and undesired, but if you can delay gratification, then there will be a period of time in which gratification will feel that much more rewarding. If someone can learn the value of discipline, then they can cope better understanding that there will be time periods of difficulty, but it will be temporary, and the sun will come out so to speak.
This principle was so intriguing to me because Gen Y is a generation of INSTANT GRATIFICATION. With most of us growing up with technology and the presence of fast food/instant meals, having what we want has typically came fast. This influences the 20 or 30 something to want a nice car, home, up to date tech pieces, and be able to travel and go out to elaborate restaurants, clubs, etc. ASAP! At any stage before reality hits, many of our ideals are centered around a dream job, dream family, dream lifestyle. great dreams, but there's also this lucid idea that these things will come without difficulty and strife while on the route to that destination. The great thing to know is that these attainments are all past possible, but they will never come easy, not even if they were handed to us. Developing the perspective that life at any moment will have its ups and downs is powerful. Understanding that if you have a goal, it will not come by you easily. Understanding that if you are or desire to be in a major committed relationship, it should not be unhealthy, but it will take work at some point. Whether you're an entrepreneur or work for someone else, your success is going to take time. Be open enough to understand this concept, and don't turn away from what you want. Be open enough to understand this, and don't live a life of denial, unhealthy behaviors, frustration, or over compensation of stress because of the challenges. Self-discipline is needed in life, and make sure you do the universe a favor and remind others. As the great JIm Rohn says, "the same wind blows on us all; its not the wind, its the set of the sail."
With life, remember there is a lesson in any given moment~
written by Tiffany Wright
I am a true believer in the power of story telling. when you share from a true experience, and true space, you not only heal yourself but allow someone else to experience healing and growing lessons. Whether it is an anecdote from someone's life, or a valuable teaching text/audio...these words of truth are empowering, trans-formative and a form of personal development. With that, i wanted to share a book that a close friend of mine told me about today. It's called Tapping the Power Within by Iyanla Vanzant. I've read a couple of pages, and its very powerful. There were 2 sections of the book I read that stood out with me very much, Trust Yourself & Honor Yourself. These two commands can be challenging at times; especially when we start exploring areas of ourselves, or even taking risks on ourselves that we haven't before.
To Trust Yourself means to "live beyond past errors, unconscious choices, and self-judgements. Knowing that you are authorized by the universe to re-create yourself and your experiences.(p.72)' How challenging does that seem sometime? Even in my decision to go after my dreams and begin BE! I have experienced duality of joy and questioning. Questioning because so much in my life has changed, and as soon as I said yes, the universe opened which is a great thing, but in moments of silence you can always ask what if? One thing I know for certain, is learning how to stay in the discipline of feeding your mind with all things uplifting because your "what if this doesn't work" will turn in to "what if I can have even more, do even more, see even more." When your spirit, mind, emotion, and body are aligned, then the vibrations you feel deep within our messages from God about the path you should walk. Once you step foot on the path, trust it. Trust the process, and trust your alignment.
Honoring yourself "requires that you act in way that is supportive & self-nurturing. Its the internal impetus not to discount or deny who you are. (p.72). So first you must TRUST yourself, and then you must HONOR yourself. Thinking, feeling and acting against ourselves is a form of self inflicted abuse. Its harmful to our beings, and to the possibilities that are waiting for us. This week , I ask that you be aware of the conversations in your head. Acknowledge where you are, and love yourself for it. Love yourself by trusting and honoring yourself. If in reflection you realize that there is more for you, respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you or is aligned with the ultimate joy of your life.
Written By: Tiffany Wright
What types of happenings do you put value on in your life? What do you consider to be characteristics of "success"? What type of legacy would you leave? Do you consider yourself to be independent, dependent or interdependent? However you choose to answer these questions, understand that you don't live life a lone, therefore a major key to what happens in your life is impacted by the people around you, and the relationships you create. There are of course many types of relationships; platonic, romantic, casual, professional, distant, childhood, familial, etc. Believe or not, all these relationships mean something. They either make us stronger, are a reflection of how we view ourselves or how we think we should be treated. The challenge is that in the midst of all these relationships, we don't necessarily pay attention to the different categories and of up most importance, which ones are our "QUALITY" relationships. Now, I am very sure we all define Quality differently, but for the sake of this post, quality is defined as something of a distinguished significant nature. A quality relationship is marked by growth, accountability, open sharing, positivity, nurturing, and most of all, something indescribable.
These quality relationships can serve as a mirror that truly shape us as human beings for the better. These are relationships that challenge us to be better people because as the end of the day no one should stay the same. One should always be open to growing, transforming and becoming better; the only thing constant in life is change, and that should be you. Ask yourself.
Do the people I surround myself with challenge me to be better? Do they challenge me to go after my dreams? Am I in relationships in which, if something drastic occurred, I could depend on someone? Do me and person X hold each other accountable? for the promises we make with one another or for ourselves ? Is there more positivity or negativity exchanged? Does person X majority of the time have my best interest at hand? If yes to all, it sounds like you have some quality . Be grateful, for if the world had more quality relationships, this world would be different.
I guarantee you, everyone comes into your life for a reason, and the people that you create quality relationships with really reflect your character and where you want to be in life . You are a blossoming flower so make sure that those in your life are watering and not drowning you.
This candle jar represents the truth of our time here on this Earth, "Life is a Journey, not a Destination," and every experience that we have is meant to shine light on our pathways. When you can understand that your life will never look like anyone else's and is ALWAYS meant to serve a greater purpose, there is a sense of expanded awareness , gratitude and resiliency to be experienced. The light in your journey may also serve as representation for the most authentic you. The you that shines when you say yes to life, and yes to those desires that lie so deep within. That light that's dim in most because of fear, or doubt planted by someone else who's let their own light dim. Your authentic self; who you were designed to be, is molded by your journey, and simultaneously shines to guide you, and sends light to someone else. Just think about what happens when a room is dark or dimly lit and a light shines.
This month I am enrolled in Deepak Chopra & Oprah 21 day meditation challenge, and the focus is Desire & Destiny. It is so true that when you connect to who you are, and who's you are, the more steps you take into your BEing , and abundance surrounds you. Shine bright on journey; lend your light to someone else and share your passionate desires!
What desire do you have that you have told yourself you are not worthy of going after? What desire has someone shared their opinion about that you feel is now reason to walk away? Do you feel fulfilled in all areas of your life? Is their "something" people encourage you to do but you find excuses. Take 2 minutes to think, if there were no limitations, and I was free to do what I pleased, what would it be??
You just might shock yourself. as you do this exercise, do the world, and yourself a favor, by taking one step towards that desire. Take one step towards thinking of your purpose. I guarantee you'll spark something and you will begin to experience life completely different!
you can find the powerful challenge here
Written by Tiffany Wright