You are either alive or your dead. You are moving or at a standstill. Life is a manifestation of growth, change and purpose. Every living and even unliving thing has a purpose. From the ant to the whale. From the rose to YOU. Every purpose looks different, but in it's absolute value, all purpose is equal. Life in itself is an adventure and we decide to be the Explorer or the Spectator. With no intention but reflection and catharsis, I wanted to write about the abstracts of life. Take what you need, leave what you don't, and pass it on.
In its' entirety, life is truly a beautiful experience. If it was to be captured in art form, it would be a mixed media composition with hints of impressionism and abstract highlights. It would have every color imaginable and if possible would feature mixtures of oils, pastels, and even chalks. Yes, life is beautiful when you can stand back, look at it and appreciate the masterpiece that it is. Unpredictable and unique. When you're in the midst of it, you may not always be able to see the beauty. When it seems that you're experiencing resistance, strife, struggle or pain, it can seem more like a Monet; undesirable up close, but beautiful as you step back. Sometimes when I feel dazed and underwhelmed, I have to consider the grander picture. I must consider howw every moment serves a purpose and I, to a certain degree, am the master artist of my life's work. I've never been a detailed oriented person, so undertaking the responsibility of looking at life through a greater lens is the most beneficial when I feel like asking so many questions.
Just learn live and BE. Learn to accept what you can't change, and be still and connected with the strength and power within you, to change what you can.
I write often about understanding the polarity of the human experience. In not only understanding the polarity of our experiences but also about learning to connect every range of emotions that come as a consequence of these experiences. As great as it would be to always feel on top of the world, that is not reality. It would be ideal to have perfect relationships with everyone in your life but it is just not the case. You will be dissapointed in, proud of, in and out of live with, excited, irritated, and inspired by those you feel close attachments with. Life will be up and down and remember that it's a perfect algorithm of nature. Know that to experience the emotions, the ebbs and flow without judgement, will keep you free and empowered to keep going.
Remember that the only thing constant in life is change. You may affect the world, but it will continue to revolve no matter what you decide to do or not do. Therefore BE still when it's necessary, and keep going when it's time to because that's the natural disposition of life. Nothing will stop for you, so you have to nurture your mimd, body and spirit to stay focused and keep progressing.
Never underestimate the value that you bring to this world and those in it. It is an ironic truth that all that we go through becomes stories of encouragements for others. No matter how straight or crooked your path has been, it will serve a purpose if you are open to giving of yourself.
Last week I had the opportunity to speak at a local high school, and as always it was so important to me to plant seeds and affect at least one young person. I remember what it was like to sit on class and listen to teacher's or guest speakers try to motivate the class; sometimes I could care less and other times they had something that I would remember. Even if it was one sentence that stood out, I can remember my connection to those statements as of this very minute. Words stick, which is why whether we choose to speak life or illness against someone matters so much.
I had 30 minutes to speak to a group of 9th graders. My goal is always to sneak concepts of self love in when I speak to young people because I know they will become adults with a little extra sense of awareness. Consider the types of talks you had with elders. No matter what you remember, there were words that stayed with you.
Remember that power when speaking to anyone. Take one day, and really be aware of what you to and about others, no matter if they are around or not. If anything compromising or negative is expressed give yourself an act to committ, like giving a random compliment or doing a pushup!
BE love and spread love!
How can an idea that you have no clarity on become so fearful for others. We tend to shy away from the unknown because we are unsure in the outcomes. We tend to ignore and rebel against trying something different because we assume we know what the outcome will be, but in actuality of we really knee the future, in truth and hindsight our lives would look different. In letting our sense of self love, truth and acceptance guide us we do get to make what we assume are the best and healthiest decisions, but in reality we never really know what the future holds. Going into unknown territory is such an empowering experience because you just don't know what's going to happen; you're taking a risk, and the greater risks you take the greater rewards you can reap.
In self love you learn to trust yourself and even if your mind doesn't know what to make of a new territory, your spirit is guiding you so you can't lose. Just go! Do what your mind may fear but your spirit pulls on you to do. In your career, in travel, in love, and in experiencing life!
BE open to trusting your instincts and honoring your spirit as you go through this beautiful and unpredictable journey.
Written by: Tiffany W.
Today I had an interesting conversation with a close loved one about self love. He asked me, so if you teach people self love, when did you learn that you didn't love yourself anymore? His question sparked a sense of curiosity within myself. When people who are not purposely pursuing a self love journey hear or see others speaking about it, do they feel that those journey walkers do not love themselves?
Well this post is centered around my response to his question. I cannot state a specific moment in which I can remember realizing that I didn't love myself because I do not think that was ever the case. There were absolutely moments in which I said, ok if I didn't feel as broken I wouldn't have done or allowed XYZ, or if I was more secure or comfortable with myself I wouldn't have said, done or thought XYZ. There was never one event or time that I stopped loving myself. I feel we are too multifaceted for that to occur.
I do believe we may honor and accept one part of ourselves, while neglecting another. Self-love is not always a black and white concept. It's not that you have or don't have it. Sometimes its about to what degree it exists. Life is complex and so are human beings. You may honor your potential, dreams and desires by living a life of ambition, but despise looking at certain parts of your body. You may live a super fit and healthy lifestyle while speaking envy, negativity, and jealousy towards other beings everyday. You may honor your body, but there is something in your spirit that you don't honor, therefore you curse those around you. It can truly be that complex because we are literally on a journey.
I don't believe that there is a point in which you reach a supreme status of knowing. There's always more to love, more to heal, and more ways to grow. Self Love is all about awareness and acceptance. See the value in learning is that you realize you don't know what you don't know until someone or something introduces the topic to you. Take self love for instance. People don't commonly use this phrase in their everyday vernacular. Before your (and my) introduction to the word self love, you were familiar with it's manifestations: self esteem, confidence, healthy relationships, and maybe self worth. But it was only after realizing that self love is the umbrella in which all these concepts exist, that you can now take a step back and constantly evaluate whether you are operating out of self love.
Don't feel obligated to stating whether you love yourself. I think it might be a small fraction of people who hate themselves and literally everything about their life. Their is also a small fraction of people who are not aware of how they think, act and feel. Just commit to working on your relationship with yourself everyday. Everyday looks different, and every day you might be grounded in a different truth, it's ok. Explore who you are and learn to love it.
Written by: Tiffany W.
Happy Monday BEautiful BEings!
It's a new week, and a new opportunity to expand your mind, heart and universe. I want you to take a deep breath; Inhale for 5 seconds and exhale for 5 seconds, go ahead... As you breathe in, think of the beauty that exists in your world, and feel the truth of your dreams coming to pass. Whatever you focus your energy on, you give power to. If you're going to think about anyone or anything, you might as well think the highest thoughts as possible so you can feed a BEautiful monster.
No matter where you are or what you're doing in life, you have the capability to do more, to walk in purpose, to live your passion, and work on your dream. There's no need to judge yourself based on where other's are, just do you and continue to be inspired. Take consistent action towards anything you want to do. The rewards come full circle as you smile more from the inside out because you are honoring yourself. Every dream or passion doesn't have to make you a millionaire, we all are driven by different values and want to share our dreams different. If you just want to pursue your dream for the sake of doing it, great! If you want to pursue it and make a living, great!
No matter what, in all you do honor your spirit! Don't just be motivated, BE Determined and Focused in making some things happening in your life. Live boldly, and love yourself in the process. Today, write 3 steps you will take towards working on a dream that his week! Share them with one person and get to work!
Written by: Tiffany W.
In reflection of my 27th birthday today, I wanted to share 26 lessons that I've learned in the last year of life. Some lessons I ended up re-learning, as hard headed kids often do, and others were newly experienced. I'm a firm believer in the power of transparency, vulnerability and sharing stories. This is one method of learning, story telling. I hope that if one lesson resonates, you hold fast to it. If not, pass this on to someone else because they may need it. There's so many lessons I've learned that's it's going to be in my second book, Journey of a 20 Something which I will be releasing next year. Comment and let me know if you anything resonates with you.
1. Intuition is your greatest GPS. Listen to that little voice inside because it's more than likely correct. This is one foundation of self love. I value lessons but I know I could have prevented some pain, struggle, amd strife if I would've listened to my spirit. When you get that feeling to avoid something, some place, or someone, please follow it. Your spirit knows what's conducive for you.
2. Never say never. You will be humbled.
3. Don't mix finances in relationships. I already knew this but I let my emotions overcome knowledge and now I'm paying for it...literally.
4. If you ask for signs to help you, don't ignore them once presented.
5. Comparison really is the thief of joy.
6. It's OK to feel. BE truthful and experience both ends of the spectrum, pain and joy. If you always block out the negative feelings, you may eventually experience a breakdown, and an emotion overload.
7. Admit you don't know, when you don't know. I experienced a period of anxiety and depression I wouldn't wish on anyone, and so many times people would ask, How do you feel? What's next? What's going on? What are your plans for etc.? I would dread thinking of something that sounded nice to appease them and protect my ego, I got to a point where I didn't care anymore and wanted to respond with honesty and admit that I had no clue about what was next. Everything was what it was. In light of letting go of judging life, I stopped responding, " I'm good or Everything is good." I'd respond, "I'm living or " I'm blessed." People feel pressure to give acceptable answers or these b.s. filler answers, when they may not be truly aligned with their current experience. You don't have to fake the funk, just don't sit in the funk.
8. Doing your best will really prevent you from experiencing self judgement, doubt, or regret
9. Joy will always begin with you. It's source CANNOT be in people, places or things. My world got turned inside out this year. Ended a 3 year relationship. After the fact I found out my partner cheated on me for half the relationship and I took on massive debt because of decisions I made. My credit score went from good to poor. I gave up my apartment. My car gave out, leaving me car-less. I've had to live on faith and the support of friends and family. Learning to let go of my attachment was the most difficult but refreshing experience. Now my joy is not in all the things that I used to think helped define me. It's in the source of my being, source of love, stillness of my peace, and power of God in my life.
10. Nurture relationships because those who really will be there, are really angels. I never really realized how many people really cared about me until I had to depend on others, but I believe they were there because of the love we've shared collectively. Naturally when you're depressed, you remove yourself, but few people checked on me, encourage me, and emotionally supported me. The world responds to you. People will care for you when they feel respected, honored, and cared for by you. Never burn any bridges, but absolutely make sure to pour into relationships that mean a lot to you. I know it's challenging because of life, sometimes we want to reach out to people, we think about them, but we get distracted and don't reach out. Make time. I've gotten better, but I still need to improve. You may never know who you are to someone nor may others know who they are to you, but give love no matter what.
11. Self love is the key to live a life worth living. Check every past blog post :)
12. Perfection is a construction that exists in your mind, and collective minds of those who try to define it.
13. Happiness is the offspring of joy. Joy comes from deep down inside. Just because your smiling and look happy doesn't mean you have joy, and just because you don't smile a lot doesn't mean you don't have joy.
14. Learn to let go, in every way possible. This is kind of like like (9) but different. Letting go of anyone, anything, any thought or any behavior that doesn't serve you is empowering. Whether these sources bring you joy or not, it doesn't matter, you just have to let go. For some people, that could be letting go of walls and letting others in. For others that can be releasing yourself from being so serious, and having more fun and exciting experiences in your life. Just let go, and don't hold back who you can be, what you can, and what you can experience.
15. Living by the four agreements will change your life: Don't take ANYTHING personally, be impeccable with your word, don't make assumptions and do your best. Google it.
16. Continued learning is fundamental. Reading, listening to audiobooks, watching documentaries/ history channel/animal planet, taking free online courses (Coursera) and reading articles of substance will help you continue to grow and expand. There's always something to learn.
17. What you do impacts others whether they (the ones being impacted) admit it or not. I think about others all the time. I reflect on their social media post. I think about current and past conversations with people and they don't even know. Sometimes I send random hi texts because those people have crossed my mind, but it reminds me that people will remember what you say AND how you make them feel.
18. Vulnerability is tough for most people.
19. Not having healthy examples of love will shape every relationship you have, but you won't know that they we're unhealthy until you know what a healthy relationship looks like.
20. Forgiveness opens abundance in your life. Letting go of ill feelings against someone else shifts your energy and how you react to the world. When you hold onto anything negative, it deteriorates within your soul, and interrupt the flow of positivity that could possibly be in your life.
21. People will treat you how they want based off their own experiences and self worth, whether negative or positive.
22. The ways of nature and the patterns that exist in it really are great teachers for the human experience. We tend to separate ourselves from nature but we are really all connected. Understanding the functioning of the seasons, sexuality, nurturing and hierarchical patterns of different animals, the growth of plants, etc. really are symbolic of how we can understand are own lives.
23. Eating well and exercising really do enhance your mood, concentration, skin, body, and overall life. Pay very close attention to how you feel and operate when you're on your healthy tip. You feel great. When you feel great, you look great, and life seems better because you're making great decisions. Turning your healthy phase
into a lifestyle opens up a whole new world.
24. Life is better with controlled use of social media and smart phone technology. The best days came when I intentionally decided to unplug. Social media creates fantasies you get caught up in. It creates an obsession with caring about what others think. Plugging in distracts you from creating authentic connections and having organic interactions. Phoning someone is so much better than texting. Texting has too many politics nowadays.
25. When you find out what gives you peace, keep doing that but it's OK to add something to your regiment. Dancing, jazz and gospel, listening to sermons and reading my Bible works for me. When I let those things go, I started going a little off the ringer. They are my foundation and keep me sane. They are my truths and allow me to feel secure and feel connected to my source. I've picked up other sources of inspiration, but will not veer from those practices.
26. When you learn to genuinely love yourself, you will develop a confidence that no one can shake. People will make suggestions, they will try to challenge you, they will try threaten you and they will pass on doubt to you. If you are insecure then what they say and do will impact you. This insecurity is normal until you intentionally enter some walk in purpose. When insecurity exists, you will enter in relationships that are unnecessary. You will walk in fear. You will feel confused. You will feel guilty about little things. You will have struggles around perfection. Even though we are constantly evolving, when you get to any point of being connected to your highest, you live with purpose, boldness, and confidence in who you are. You will stay away from people, places, and things that don't serve you, and you will be OK with it. You're wise enough to know that you know, what you know but you know there's more that you don't know about life. You know that people will tell you what they think is best without living those truths themselves. Most importantly you know without a doubt that you are not perfect and you are OK with whatever the perfect imperfect you looks like; it doesn't care for judgements from others.
Life is a canvas, and you are the artist.
Are you living Courageously? Are you living with Faith? Does fear rule over your life?
These are questions I often ask myself when reflecting on my journey. Life is a game of endless possibilities and for every decision we make, our life can be affected by alternate decisions. It's really kind of magical if you think about it. Every moment, minute, hour, and day actually does make a difference. Life is a collection of little miracles that can expand in proportion to our courage, faith, and action.
In my journey thus far, I can say just choosing to live your best life, whatever that means for you, will lead you to a life you love. For some, it may take longer than others, but life is really about the journey of experiences and BEcoming. On your journey, you must consistently reflect on what is propelling you in life. Is it purpose? your family? love? faith? courage? or fear?
Of course to me, the best of anything begins in love. Love, especially self love, knows no perfection, so it equips you to live from a place of openness and acceptance. When you are open, you receive more opportunities from the universe. You are open to meeting new people, having different experiences, and trying different things. Acceptance is the complete antithesis of judgements. No experience or choice is bad, it's just a step, and accepting every decision, purpose and experience as a step, gives you a more positive outlook in life and healthier opportunity for resilience and transformation. Love will help you make the best decisions you can based off your connection with source of BEing and your faith. You'll either float or drown, and both are wonderful because they are both paths of wisdom. We learn best from experience. Love most importantly allows you to live in gratitude! Gratitude doesn't mean you believe everything is ultimately perfect but all that you have is perfect for the now, and the more joy and contentment you have for the now, the more opportunities will present themselves for an increase of abundance. Gratitude is of the same coin of acceptance, and it feels amazing to take in peace and joy, and just BE thankful.
Today is a beautiful day if you want it to be. Today is an adventurous day if you want it to be. Let today be what you want. Honor your feelings, but don't limit experiences to whatever they may be. Choose to BE who and what you want at every moment. Take a chance or yourself because you are worthy of greatness and of Love! Even if you feel fear, doubt, reservation choose to BE Fearless, BE Bold, BE Courageous, BE Free and BE You!
Written by: Tiffany Wright
Whenever you need inspiration or guidance in life, look first within yourself and look secondly to nature. Imagine that when everything is going well, you feel great. Like that of the summer, clear skies, warm weather, and the sun glistening on your skin. But it is truth that every summer is different. A typical Los Angeles summer is different from an Orlando, New York, or Cabo San Lucas summer. Some summers are perfectly pleasant, other have seemingly unbearable heat, while others experience dangerous storms and hurricanes.
Even when everything looks good, trials and challenges will be come about. Right now in Los Angeles, we're experiencing an abnormal heat wave. Granted, 90 degrees may not be hot for some of you, but humidity and high temperatures are not normal for LA. It's uncomfortable. Yes it's beautiful outside. Yes we have the beach, but this weather is so uncomfortable, people don't even want to be outside. Just as in life, there are different seasons, and some are more pleasant than the other. But just because you may be in your season of summer, it does not mean you will not face discomfort and challenges. Just know, there's only so much you can control. You enjoy what you can, and be patient and understanding of the rest. Go with the flow and realize every season will not go according to your expectations. You are powerful but there is a greater power than you, and you just have to be OK with that.
Look to nature. Seasons, climate, animals, plants, water, etc. all serve as great teachers to understand the power of change, growth, flexibility, flow, strength, purpose, love, and so much more.
By: Tiffany W.
Happy Monday BEAUTIFUL BEings! It's a new week full of possibilities! It's a new day, and right now presents a new moment for you to open your mind and spirit to the beauty, power, and strength within you! I want you to remember to embrace all of you! Especially that which you could be ashamed of, internally or externally. Love and embrace your scars. Scars tell stories, and stories provide lesson, insight, and connections. No matter how simplistic or deep the story is, whenever you share it with someone, it means something to them; they relate to it in some way or consider a parallel event to it.
Scars are beautiful. When others see or hear about your scars, it makes them a little more confident about their own experience. Think about it. If you were on the beach, covered up because you were ashamed of your stretch marks, but saw another woman wearing them proudly with a bright bikini on, wouldn't you possibly think, wow I wish I could do that!? Every scar means something and every scar matters.
When I was 4/5 I had a neighbor that I would play with or bother often. I always was surrounded by older kids or boys. My neighbor was an older boy, and I thought it was fun to act tough, challenge him, and be like one of the boys. One day, he came to my house, and we made mothers day gifts from separate rooms. For some reason I started taunting him, called him a punk and ended up busting my head on the tv stand because we were playing around. I had a major open wound and got about 15 stitches. Ooooooh they hurt soooo much; right over my eyebrow. 21 plus years later, the wound has healed, but the scar still remains. The scar taught me to watch my mouth, learn how to respect people, and don't jump on the bed. See the truth is, some scars will never go away, but the wounds they resulted from, will eventually heal.
Know that whatever you have been or are going through, can and will contribute to your life. I challenge you to alter how your perspective on any scars you have. Cease to look at them as a wound that will never heal or as a burden or scarlet letter on your life. Pain and hurt happens, but the beauty it creates can be a masterpiece. Learn to love all that you've experienced. Even if the experience brought her and pain, believe me, it will be worth, and time, your mind, body and spirit will heal it. The grace, self acceptance, and self love you are healed.
Written by: Tiffany W.
When you know that you know, that what you are thinking, feeling and doing aligns properly, it's a massively powerful feeling! See that's perfection, when you can connect to your spirit, you love on your spirit, and you follow it's direction. Allow your spirit to condone what you do, not what others think you should do, or the stories created in your head says you should or should have done. When you're secure in your spirit, there's no need to have a wondering mind or heart because you made the perfect choice based on the guidance of your spirit.
It's so easy to make a decision and feel u earthed and unsure afterwards. The older you get, it seems every decision impacts another. I mean, to be honest, this is the case because our life is the result of everything we do and don't do, but nonetheless, each decision can be swallowed easily if you make it thru the guidance of your spirit. How treacherous of an experience is it to live life beating yourself up about the choices you make? The men or women you date? The job you choose? The location you live?
Release yourself of it all. Sit in the perfect peace of your guiding light because if you don't, you can drive yourself off your rocker thinking should've, could've, would've. If you are a woman of today, this probably already happens often, which is understandable because we live in this time warp of imaginary perfection. Perfection exists to the extent that you are satisfied with your decisions and your life. So the more grounded you get in yourself, the higher your satisfaction in life will be. Let things be what they will be. You BE who you want to BE and who your purposed to BE! Love yourself and trust yourself!
By: Tiffany W.