Choosing Your Tribe is an act of Self Love

The older I get, I realize the extreme importance of being my mindful of who I share my emotion, time, energy, laughter, insecurities, fears and visions with. Everyone isn't meant or built to hold you up and hold the space you need. At this point, I can absolutely testify to the statement " your vibe attracts your tribe, " as well as Jim Rohn's words, "you are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with." Thank goodness I love my tribe!

What is a tribe? A tribe is a collection of people who share values, customs, and traditions. Your tribe is your network. The people you give and receive advice to and from. Those you spend time with. Those who you collaborate with to express ideas to the world. Those who you set aside time for,  to bond. These can be your close friends or highly cordial associates.

This year, I've received some clear visions of some pretty big changes that might happen, especially around personal goals. With big vision has come big fear and I've been experiencing an unusual amount of it lately.  As easy as it would be to get caught up in my fear, for the first time, I decided to really express what I was feeling with some of my friends. I must say, receiving the support love, encouragement and push I needed from my girl friends, is something the word grateful can't even describe. 

I've always been grateful for the friends that I have, but in reflection of the support they lent me, made me realize how blessed I am to have such a diverse tribe of women, on so many different journeys that is so parallel with mine. At 28, the people I spend the most time discuss visions, goals, purpose, spiritual development, personal transformation, self care, self love, healthy romance, arts, travel and social justice. If you gather at least 5 of my friends, you will indeed see they reflect me, whole heartedly and that is awesome!

When I was younger, I was obligated to building friendships with people that were near me, whether in school or my neighborhood, but we get more freedom the older we get. The fact that I feel safe with my tribe and I am rather naive to the occurrence of "2-faced hater-type" friends that I often see portrayed in media and especially memes, lets me know I'm pretty blessed. That's not my world and I'm grateful.

We are all on our own journeys, and some journeys may be more complimentary for your life than others. You don't HAVE to be friends or associates with any and everyone. You GET to choose. Make sure you CHOOSE carefully. Every friend you have doesn't have to be the same as you, doesn't have to look like or even speak like you, but is the state of their life aligned with where you are or want to be? That's what matters.  Do they strengths you would like to have? Are they positive? Would they promote you if you had something to promote? Do you have a mutually beneficial relationship? Do you empower one another? Do you feel that you could be open to speak about different parts of your being? These are questions to ask when in reflection about your tribe.

For me, I can confidently say yes. This is not to brag, but to share with you the importance of knowing who you are and knowing what you need. Its about honoring your self and honoring your spirit, by acknowledging who you are but also the importance of the energy you surround yourself with.

The 4th Commandment of Self Love is: Honor Thy Spirit . Do you pay attention to what environments or what type of people your spirit needs to thrive? Do you love yourself enough to select your tribe like you select your clothes, hairstyles, jobs, shoes and food?...with effort?

BE Empowered,

Tiffany W.

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