In the midst of all you do, stuff happens and you show the self you're trying so hard to elevate.
When I saw this meme, I laughed so hard because its soooo true! Well especially for me. The point is that we are all on our own journeys ( a phrase I use when I'm aware that my not so zen self has emerged) and we can acknowledge that we are multidimensional beings on a constant pursuit of transformation.
I find it very interesting that the mind has a tough time registering conflicting images, principles, personalities, etc. For example, the religious leader who drinks, uses profanity, has an affair, or embezzles money. The very quiet man or woman who lives a secret bdsm lifestyle. The hypermasculine bike rider who loves playing with puppies and gardening.
It's ok to have dualities. That is the beauty of life. It's even more ok to accept whatever dualities exist within you. Others may not understand but you're living your own life.
When you're on a journey of bettering yourself, people like to keep tabs of what you do. When your old and new self, which is still one, collides, the world will remind you. There's a difference between individuals holding you accountable versus ascribing certain expectations to you because of whatever you're aspiring to become. It's ok. You're on a journey. You will veer off sometime.
To be human is to simply be imperfect. There are no absolutes, and no one has any actual intuitive obligation to enlist expected standards on another person's life.
Many times every week I find myself not always honoring myself or another the way I know and feel I/they should be honored. When I'm zen, I'm zen, when I'm not, I'm aware, I own it and keep it pushing.
One of my favorite quotations:
"Do I contradict myself? Very well I contradict myself. I am large, I contain multitudes."
Just as my grandfather says: "you are absolutely perfect. As long as you believe it, that's all that matters. That world out there, just responds to you." Do be mindful the world responds to you, and in all that you are if you remember the first commandment of self love: Honor thyself, I believe you're on a great path to be a perfectly evolving imperfect you!
By: Tiffany W.
Happy Monday BEautiful BEing!
If you're reading this, not only have you've been blessed with another beautiful day to BE love, give love and receive love but you're blessed with the capacity to see and pay forward today's post!
I just wanted to share some soul filled reminders of how to fill yourself up today and keep yourself filled up so you can live a love and purpose driven life!
1. State your gratitude. Whether in the morning, before bed or throughout the day, consider at least 10 things, people, or opportunities you're grateful for. Gratitude is an expression of positive emotion and a foundation of an abundant life. When you're focused on what you're grateful for, there's not much room for complaint. Don't want to go to work this morning? Be grateful you have a job and an opportunity to skillfully contribute to the world!
2. Check in with a positive message or look at positive content. Messages like, " You're Awesome," " Today I choose joy," etc. are great mesaages to inhale. The more you fill your mind and spirit up with positive words, the more positive thoughts and behaviors you'll have, thus creating a life that you can appreciate more. Listen to a motivational message on YouTube (there's thousands maybe millions of them). Listen to positive upbeat music.
3. Before you speak, THINK! Look below.
4. Smile as much as possible. It will keep you in a better move and increase your energy.
5. Get up and move every hour! Stay active to keep your blood flow healthy, keep your energy up, and keep your metabolism active.
6. Give Love. Dish out compliments, smiles, random acts of kindness, and positive affirmations to folks.
7. BE You. Situations and people will lead you to question yourself and may even lead to feel ashamed or uncomfortable, but no matter what, just be you. BE mindful of where you can grow and improve, but stay in a place of Honoring Yourself!
By: Tiffany W.
As an avid reader, I find not only enjoyment in delving into a new book for my own growth but I absolutely love to share what areas within myself that have been affected and shifted because of insights I've connected to in a book.
If service is the rent you pay to be on Earth, then sharing insights of transformation and expansion must be your utilities
This month I've been reading, Living Beyond Your Feelings by Joyce Meyer. We all have feelings and sometimes those things just totally get in the way of us living our best lives. It doesn't even have to be negative feelings.
For a woman, often times we become infatuated with men or women, we have no business being in or pursuing relationships with. Maybe your spirit tells you one thing but your feelings have you feeling all types of high, joyful and excited.
Sometimes we want to go after a goal so bad or embark on a new adventure thats been sitting inside us but we're too fearful because we don't want to get out of our comfort zone or even be challenged with the process of surrendering to the unknown.
Excitement or sadness can blind us from truth. Pride can tarnish relationships. Hurt and distrust can exclude you from allowing love in your life. Feeling, feelings, feelings. They can surely lead us astray.
In our quest to becoming our highest selves, we must constantly keep tally of ways to support and strengthen our own journeys. Between our spirits, our minds, our bodies and life circumstances, becoming more clear and releasing less confusion is a satisfactory goal. In this book, one can learn to take an honest look at themselves, and reel in reality.
It's not about emotions being "bad" or not dependable, but its about awareness. Understanding how your emotions really impact your life. It's about learning to not let emotions control every aspect of you. As you learn to honor all parts of you, it will be come more clear how to handle situations and make decisions. Not saying you will be perfect, but awareness is key.
What I've come to terms with is essentially emotional regulation. Making way for truth, clarity and understanding beyond what I'm feeling in the moment. In a major way, as a dreamer and someone whose managed depression for a long, one of my greatest lessons and reconfirmations has been to not let emotions steal time or opportunities.
How do you let your feelings affect your life? Have you thought about. Count and reflect on the ways and make a commitment to be more mindful, more patient, more understanding, and as always, more aware.
By: Tiffany W.
Somehow, somewhere, and in some way we receive messages that relationships are fixed and narrow.
-First off, when you hear the word relationship, you more than likely have a romantic association with the word.
-Secondly, relationship seems like such an intense word when you think about your association with another human being.
In my quest, especially as a hopeful romantic, I’ve learned to really pull the reins in on my traditional relationship to the word relationship and be open to all that it means.
Firstly, relationship merely boils down to a connection; Any type of connection. Whether weak or strong, deep or surface, familial, platonic, work related, or even romantic interests.
Secondly, you can choose what relationships you really want to tend to and nurture, or let just run their course. Thirdly, every relationship serves a purpose. No matter how its defined.
So what am I writing about today?
Choosing relationships that feed your soul, no matter how they look. Based off some recent conversations, observations of relationships in my own and others' lives, and a recent book read (A Return to Love by Marianne Williamson) I am really letting go of traditional ideas of relationships. For one, I think it’s no surprise or new epiphany, but you don’t have to be close to people in your family. You can choose who you want to develop intense if any, soul gratifying relationships with. What I do know is that having people in your life is important, and family could be the most stable people if its possible, therefore being intentional that despite differences or even distance, respect and support should ensue.
Secondly, it’s possible to have intimate relationships not defined by romance. There’s this belief that men and women cannot have platonic relationships. I disagree. Male and female energy are meant to interact. This doesn’t mean one or both would never have thoughts of physical intimacy or of even being a couple, but the greater purpose for the relationship could really just be supportive. For two adults to get this, I do believe they have to be very mentally and spiritually mature. Sometimes people can heal you without you falling in love with them. Sometimes they can open you up or just infuse light in your life, and that’s really just it.
Thirdly, it is sooooooo important to have soul inspiring close friends of the same sex. In general, the company you keep should make you better, but what I often witness is that many people are that “strong or wise” person for others, but they don’t have anyone to be that for them, and in actuality you should have friendships where there can be an equitable exchange of “pouring” (both parties mentally, emotionally, spiritually pouring into and building up one another.)
Growth is essential to living, therefore, establishing, maintaining and nourishing selective relationships that feed this goal are essential to you thriving. Take all relationships for what they are, but believe that there are some special relationships that should exist and will exist.
Comment below and tell me your thoughts on ideas around relationships. I'd love to hear. Have you had similar or more profound understandings?
By: Tiffany W.
If you're a dedicated reader or a new guest to this blog one thing you will come to see is that self love and self care are intricate, and I believe in the value of taking daily steps to honor the 5 Commandments of Self Love, especially Honor thy Mind and Honor thy Spirit.
This is a pretty chaotic world and as a millennial woman, you have a lot on your plate: career, transitions, love life (or some derivitive of it), family, social life (or some derivitive of it), etc. and in the midst of all that, you have to find ways to maintain, stay strong, and thrive. It's so easy to let just your self go and do what you have to do to get by.
You bury your stress in binging on and indulging possibly unhealthy substances and practices. Nothing is "bad" in itself, but how you use it and how often you have it in your life makes a difference. Junk food, alcohol, drugs, sex, violence, even seclusion can get dangerous if not managed properly.
As stress comes and circumstances of life accumulate, it's important to find healthy alternatives to help you manage the health and balance of your mind, body, and spirit. Find practices of healing.
I don't believe you can have too many methods that help you heal. As long as you find what works for you, it doesn't harm you or anyone else, and you incorporate it as often as you need to help you honor your spirit, it's a green light.
Your go to steps for healing, I call that accumulation of tools, your self love tool box. For me that is white sage, incense, Gospel/zen/traditional jazz music, mediation, my Bible, writing or Yoga. When I feel a down shift or a lower level frequency in my being, these are my "go to" practices.
As someone always in search for expansion, I believe in being open to ways and practices beyond my own understanding. Why? Well I know my limits, boundaries and idiosyncrasies, and I know the practice of healing keeps me lifted and expanded.
The picture above, is a still shot from a recent activity I partook in; sound healing. Essentially a specialists uses the power of vibrations in instruments like gongs, chimes, and drums to shift energy in your body and spirit. Needless to say, it was absolutely amazing and powerful.
BEing open minded allowed me to enjoy and benefit from an alternative method of healing. I didn't even think my spirit needed any healing but I can assure you by the end of my session, I absolutely felt a shift, and blockage leaving my spirit.
I impress upon you to be open. Constantly BE in search of healing and ways that you can heal. We are not simple beings; we are beautiful balls of complication and multidimensionality. We function in life often times unaware of how out emotions and thoughts effect us. That's why healing is important.
So, take a look at your self love tool kit. Do you have go to practices? If not, start exploring what increases your joy level? What has a positive effect on your stillness? Explore and heal yourself.
By: Tiffany W.
There's a whole lot that in occurs in our lives everyday. We`ve all had situations and circumstances that could have derailed our lives. We've been through major transitions that have brought about feelings of ambiguity, joy, sadness, excitement, and even disappointment. Despite all that, one thing that remains constant, is that change occurs, and we are present for it all. So when we can choose to respond and sit in feelings such as anger, sadness, doubt, distrust, or discontent, we can powerfully choose to live life staying full of love and hope.
What does that look like?
Well that is you staying in the moment and being still in the moment while choosing to balance not only your expectations but also how you choose to honor your self, mind, body,spirit, and stay in a place of forgiveness; you know, abiding by the 5 commandments of self love. See, love really has the power to transform life and all that you choose to see.
Think about it. If you've ever been in love or have known someone who's been in love, you know everything experienced is different. Love has an effect on how you smile, interact with others, and even what you truth you decide to see in life. Well, romantic love isn't the only love with life-changing impact. So is self love, and just a centrally spirited sense of love in general.
While others around you choose to worry about being good enough, the evils of the world, the amount of wealth accumulation they have (or for most of us, the amount of debt), and why it's a good reason to not trust others or believe there is even good left in this world, you can choose a different perspective. You can choose love and hope.
Yes there are inequalities, dangers, hurtful people, and many barriers that exist in the midst of a possible great life, but at the end of the day your attitude is the determining factor. Consider the perspective that there is a life of abundance, a life if love, a life of possibilities, a life in which you can make a difference, a life that you're worthy of attaining or at least going after.
Cutting your self off to the possibilities of life is not one reflective of choosing to honor your self, mind, body,or spirit. Self love is more intricate in living a great life than most people consider. So today, this week, every day and every week, work on choosing to activate a feeling, perspective and walk of love and hope. I guarantee life will not only feel better but it will be better.
By: Tiffany W.
Could you wonder with faith?
Could you live life really knowing that your plans have nothing to do with reality?
Could you live life surrendering?
I mean, it's not like you have to, but there's a different type of awe and power that comes from just living and trusting "the way." I find that all the effort and plans in the world may lead you to what you want, but not necessarily to a place of enjoyment. You can grind, struggle, sacrifice, etc. and you miss the journey. You focus your eye so much on the prize, you fail to realize the true treasure was the path or paths you've actually travelled, and then when you obtain the prize, you're not even as appreciative of it as you could be.
I've read the stories, known people, and have even been guilty of feeling lost or even a failure because of "plans" not working out as envisioned. Being obsessed with time lines and ideas; having a clear tunnel vision of expectation but not being open to the possibility of miracles in between. There's nothing wrong with goals because they definitely can point you in the right direction. Something happens though, when you let your goals shade living life itself.
There's a lot of unknowns and in betweens. There's a lot of happenings that are unforeseen that you have no explanation or human understanding of and sometimes you need just live. You need to learn to surrender and just BE!
It's easy to get caught up in the extreme goal setting, hustle, grind, no sleep, sacrifice everything kind of lifestyle. Yes it works for people but they often have extreme trade offs for quality of life when it comes to relationships and intimate connections.
Then there are those who have no idea about anything and still feel unfulfilled, unmoved, and un-purposed.
Well I believe the goal is find balance in all. Even if you don't have the answers to what you want, that's ok. We're all on a journey of discovery, and even someone who seems like they have all the answers, absolutely doesn't. I do believe there are 3 important ideas to keep in mind to help you navigate life.
1. Keep the two commandments, honor thy mind and spirit, close to heart. Making decisions when your mind and spirit are aligned leads you to a life of satisfaction, abundance, joy and purpose.
2. Finding your purpose and living through it. Well, what if you don't know your purpose? Guess what, it's simple. Your purpose is what you're meant to share. It's sharing. Sharing a talent, a narrative, a perspective, an invention or a method of living. Every being has a purpose, and it doesn't have to look like being a motivational speaker inspiring the masses. Maybe your purpose is making others smile, sharing a talent of cooking or baking; maybe listening, being one that encourages or even challenges others. When you live a life of purpose with purpose, the Universe rewards you.
3. Give. Give love, encouragement, positivity, and wisdom. The law of giving is simple. The more you give, the more you get. The more you sow into this world, the more the world responds and the more you will reap.
In all living, balance is a goal. Give and receive love. Walk in purpose but let no one take advantage of it. Understand the alignment of mind and spirit will lead you to a beautiful life, but hard times and confusion will still occur. Letting go of control and choosing to flow will change not just "your life" but your quality of life, beginning with your physical health.
So don't be worried about not knowing answers or feeling confused. Don't be worried about not feeling perfect. Don't be worried if you feel you fell off track. Enjoy the journey. Be open to the possibilities because infinity is a concept that is very real. For every decision you make or don't make, there's an infinite number of outcomes to follow; an infinite number of paths.
When I think of how truly connected everything in life is, I joyfully think about the song and opening scene of Disney's The Lion King, in which all the animals from the pride lands came to the birthing ceremony of Simba. In the background, we hear a story about the Circle of Life.
I mean, really dissect the lyrics.
"From the day we arrive on the planet
And blinking, step into the sun
There's more to see than can ever be seen
More to do than can ever be done
There's far too much to take in here
More to find than can ever be found
But the sun rolling high
Through the sapphire sky
Keeps great and small on the endless round
It's the Circle of Life
And it moves us all
Through despair and hope
Through faith and love
Till we find our place
On the path unwinding
In the Circle
The Circle of Life"
The circle of life, the food chain, destiny, serendipity, and "everything happens for a reason" are
all very similar notions to me. Every thing and every being has a purpose. All that is orchestrated naturally in our lives, is testament that life happens full circle. Birth and death. Loss and gain. Joy and sadness.
The opposition of life is so important to understand and embrace because it shapes you to be stronger, more resilient, and of greater gratitude, if you choose to look at life's opportunities in such a way. Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we respond.
Well, if we embark on the journey of life with an open mind and spirit, knowing for sure that every person, lesson, and experience is working together, life's blows can be taken standing straight up. To be simple, I suggest for to just believe that one day, it will all make sense because it will! I promise. Well, if you're open to connecting the dots.
When you're experiencing whatever you're experiencing, sometimes you can wonder to yourself, Why? Why is this happening? You might even go so far as to wonder, why is this happening to me?
Well ...why not you? Why not now? Why not? Are you so special and unique that you should be exempt from the difficulty and challenging times of the human experience? I think not. But as you ask those questions, consider your role in the plot of life. See we have thoughts and actions that often bring certain occurrences in our lives, but in a grander scheme, we also are just containers for God's greater plans. Our influence and control only goes so far.
So in understanding that there's a grander scheme than we can imagine or create, we can choose to look at life differently. Honoring the journey, the confusion, the timing, and the seemingly incongruity. When things just don't make sense, I think that's a sign!
It's the beginning of a beautiful week, and I want you to choose the attitude," something great is in store and this is serving a great purpose! "
"This" can be the day, week, interaction with a stranger, coworker, family member, traffic, or even the time in your life. Shift your relationship with time, expectations, and development.
BE Open. BE Hopeful~
By: Tiffany W.
How do you react when shifts occur in your life?
Are you aware of their presence? Can you feel when they're about to happen?
Do you know what I'm even writing about?
A shift is a transfer of energy and power in your life. It can occur in relationships, in your spirit, in your mind, in your purpose, in your surroundings and even your career.
Often times we manifests shifts due to concentrated thought, deep desire, and maybe a little action. Consider that the slightest change in a kaleidoscope can completely alter the image. Similarly, any shift in your life, e.g. the completion of a relationship, an epiphany or new understanding of yourself, etc. can cause a ripple effect.
Shifts are real and if you embrace them, miraculous events will occur.
I've recently had a couple of major shifts (which is partly why I haven't been posting everyday, my sincerest apologies). I literally just moved from LA to the Bay Area of California and in anticipation for this shift in itself, I've experienced some deep emotions with loved ones in my last days, and I've had a couple of relationships really sprout in the last couple of weeks. All these events have rippled into a transformation of my mind and spirit in some way, and I'm absolutely grateful.
My shifts came in terms of newness and depth. So if there's something different heading your way, I implore you to be open to it.
I think the more connected you are with yourself, your spirit being, the easier you can sense when shifts are approaching your space. The deeper you get with your self, the more energy impacting experiences you become aware of. Pay attention. Recieve the refreshingly unknown and uncomfortable because there's some greatness on the other side!
By: Tiffany W.
On this beautiful day, I cannot express how open my heart is right now. Why?
Because life is beautiful!
Life is sweetest when you've had a taste of its extreme bitterness. Just like you can appreciate the spring especially when you've had a harsh winter.
As life happens, you can always hope for the best, but if you have not learned already, life will happen regardless of your hopes. There will be dark times. There will be loss. There will be hurt. There will be disappointment.
But no matter what, you still have light within you. You still have power, strength, and will to push through. And I say to you, connect to all the essence of your beauty and womanhood.
It can be easier to let go and give up, then to keep a positive mind and spirit throughout the ebbs and flow of life. One thing I know to be true, is whatver you do, and however you handle life, you will unknowingly be an example for others.
Strength does not mean you don't cry or show emotion, but it does mean that you can continue to contribute to society and the betterment of your own life. It means getting things done. It means continuing to excel. It means continuing to smile. It means continuing to let your light shine.
By: Tiffany W.